what to expect when you’re expecting...a ninth month in SE Asia
listing nine “good things” for nine months 💚 😮 💚
Welcome back to the scone archives for another edition of “Life in Lists”. Once a list-maker, always a list-maker. The years of event & conference planning life stick with me.
As I prepare to enter my ninth month in SE Asia, I wrote a list of 9 things that have brought fulfillment, intrigue and curiosity to my oh, sure, still-sorta strange life in recent time. No more pregnancy puns here. That’s not me. Cue positive reflection and the tender balance of nonchalance + surreality.
We’re practically back to the culinary memoirs. Glancing around, looking back, and taking note of what makes my days matter. Creating this list was immediate, and reading every single one makes me begin to smile.
The continued awe, and appreciation, of where I’m spending my life right now.
Nine Good Things for Nine Months
in no particular order…
Finding a pickleball crew of ex-pats from all over that plays three mornings a week. I’m active! I’m pickling! It’s healthy and social - I’m finally stronger!!! - and while it started at the beginner level, it’s grown more challenging. In a good way. Validating! Have you played? I learned to casually play that last summer in Yellowstone with seasonal employees, and if they could only see me now! (And duh, I send photos to a couple of close friends I’ve kept in touch with.)
My growing familiarity with the city of Da Nang - and the shoestring budget frugality it allows me at this stage in my transitional life !! Case in point: the normality of 25,000 VND/$0.95 cent USD bowls of Mì Quảng noodles.
Noodles: Hi, I joke that I’m becoming a noodle. I accept this. I’m Italian American. My family ate pasta most nights of the week. I still do?! Now, I add rice and other starch noodles into the mix. I’ll gently point out again that even as someone who LOVES to cook most days - and on my realistic budget - it’s soooo low-cost & sensible to continue my favorite hobby: Trying out neighborhood chay joints around the city. And when in doubt…wait…when certain…I’m usually ordering noodles. I’m talking Mì Quảng, Bún chay, Bún riêu, Cao Lầu and rare bowls of classic Phở (which, to note, isn’t as much of a mainstay in this region).
Karaoke therapy. Insert mic drop! Okay, let’s go with mood lighting, digital lyrics, a stool and a microphone. Rest assured, I go to real-er forms of therapy and discussion groups. That said, karaoke is a way of life in Vietnam. There are bars, rooms, streetside and living set-ups happening, any time of day or night. I go out once a week (or so) to get my feelings out in song. Most likely a Lana Del Rey number or two. Real talk: It seriously helps. Emotional catharsis. And fun.
Vietnamese Coffee. Ah, robusta / arabica / my morning moka routine / cà phê đen afternoons. Ah, another way of life in this country. There are hundreds of cafes and coffeeshops of all sizes & styles in this city. And at this point, I’m pretty much over oat lattes. The black coffee is just so good. If I want creamy, I opt for avocado or coconut.
Huh. I’m not exaggerating, on both counts.
The cooling of the evenings. The passing of time. The impending, mighty “rainy season” and the increasingly seeping discussion of how to prepare. How to get through. The heavy duty, plastic turquoise poncho I bought when I first arrived, to replace the Columbia rainjacket I’d sent my sister home with back in Chiang Mai, because I was so bombarded “with stuff”. Oops. Who knew I’d still be here? Not me! Pushing forward.
heading back to my current studio / An Hải Đông / August 22, 2025 7. Watching the seasons change…in fruit. The time of juicy mangos, the weeks of small yet bursting with flavor lychees & longans & rambutans, the carts high with peak dragonfruit, avocado mania, the spiky creamy funkyyyy durian takeover, and not escaping the pull of giant chunks of jackfruit. And so, so much more. It feeds my past-life (on pause?! shifted?!) of farmers market obsessions.
The act of keeping in touch. With people I care about, and those who care about me. Doing my best to nurture friendships and family ties, far and near. Helloooo, whatsapp. I like to think I got better at it in some ways when moving to remote Alaska, and if that was the test, this is the….main stage. My pickles, the vegans, the cafe dwellers, the Portlanders, the PPK, the Alaska hearts, and all “the cuties” (they know who they are).
This definitely includes all the folks *here* who’ve had a kind word (or comment!) while we share stories, again, near and far.
On writing. The multi-purpose of these precious scone archives. The strolls down memory lane of the past nine months (to be! ba da bum) and my life before. Contemplating the travel tales + real life that have been unfolding, and the how/what/why of sharing the stories of food, market meanders, photo essays, and indeed, the inevitable culinary memoirs that spill out. Soft pride, inspirations + meaning, for sure.
Deep breaths! Turn the page.
Perpetually to be continued:
In upcoming future missives, I’ll be swinging back to cohesive travel writing & photo essays. Naturally, I have a set of lists, handwritten notes! and the goal of talking more about what makes my days + nights in SE Asia so interesting & delicious.
Hey! What else do people - You! - want to know about my unexpected “expat” life in Vietnam?
References + Relevant Links:
An Art and Culture Lover’s Guide to Da Nang, Vietnam Vogue Singapore May 14, 2025
The Best Coffee Shops in Da Nang, Hoang Viet Travel
the smashed elephant in the room is me, these scone archives March 29, 2025
Not-so-P.S.
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Thanks for reading this far down, across, and distant.
As the scone un-crumbles….
<3 jess
Love this so much! The karaoke and the durian and the coffee (so very intrigued by the avocado coffee)
Jess, I read this when you posted it but it’s been a bit of a week and forgot to reply, I think (or have I already left a comment? lol). I’ve been thinking about your question around what else we’d like to know. For me, it would be interesting to learn more about the naturally vegan or vegetarian dishes they have there… how to make them. Not so much the recipe, but the guiding principles, if I can call them that. Also I don’t know how you ended up there: what lead you there, why did you choose that city, how it felt to be there when you first moved, big differences between that place and the US or other places where you lived. You might have already written all this, sorry if you have and I haven’t read it. I’ve only been here for a couple of months :)